...I believe this truth is one that is hard for many men to receive. I'm talking about Christians here, who are supposed to get it. I've seen this in my own experience time and time again. We continue applying the merit template: I'm good, and so God loves me (or, similarly, I'm a Christian, and so God loves me); I'm bad (or, I have weak faith), and so God is miffed, disappointed, maybe even angry. I have seen Christian men cling persistently to this template like drowning men to a water-saturated log. They say they believe in the grace of God, but they live like they don't. Maybe that's because to let go of the log would mean admitting they'd been wrong all these years. Men don't like to do that.
The grace of God is powerful, but there is something in us, in our flesh, that resists it. We need to be realistic about ourselves in this. The gospel remains "hard to believe." That is, hard to accept, to walk in. To trust. The merit-template feels much more natural and intuitive. That's where we're at home. It's what we understand. Rewards for the good, punishment for the bad. But God is asking us to believe him when he says, "I love you now and forever, I have forgiven your sins, and my plan is to walk with you in a garden as I once did with Adam. After the cross, there is no longer any room for shame and hiding."
I have to constantly remind myself that my moment to moment fellowship with God is just as much dependent on the grace of God as is ultimate eternal destiny.
How about you?
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