From: Christian Pickup Lines Reprise « Thinking Out Loud:
- "“I didn’t believe in predestination until tonight.”
- “I believe one of my ribs belongs to you.”
- “Hey.. i would work 7 years for your sister.. but I would work 7 more years for you.”
- “Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Gilead”
- “You put the ‘cute’ back in persecution…”
- “Feel free to meet me at the threshing floor.”
- “You’re totally depraved but I’d still like to go out with you…”
- “I’m interested in full time ministry, and not only that… I also play the guitar.”
- “Look, you’re nearly 22. Most Christians are 3 years into marriage by now… just settle for me.”
- “Have you died before? Because that looks like a resurrection body to me..”
- “I would have asked you out to dinner, but I just put all my money in the offering basket.”
- “Hi, I’m Calvin. You were meant to choose me.”
- “All I’m looking for is a Godly woman. I don’t care that you’re not attractive.” (That will go down well for sure)
- “Can I buy you a non-alcoholic beverage?”
- “My favorite species of vegetation is the church plant.”
- “I have many sponsor children. one in each developing nation.”
- “Who’s your favorite apostle?”
- “The word says ‘Give drink to those who are thirsty, and feed the hungry’; how about dinner?”
- “I have familiarized myself with all 5 love languages, in fact, I invented 4 of them.”
- [check the person's shirt tag] “Just as i thought… made in heaven.”
- “For you I would slay two Goliaths”"
Saturday, April 24, 2010
For My Single Guy Friends: Some Christian Pickup Lines
For the consideration (and laughter) of my single male readers - some Christian pick-up lines::
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ugh!
ReplyDelete“My favorite species of vegetation is the church plant.”
I think I've used “I have familiarized myself with all 5 love languages, in fact, I invented 4 of them.” at one time or other
From Nelson Searcy's site... in the same spirit.
ReplyDeleteThe Top 10 Signs Your Sermon Isn’t Going Well
13. Your associate pastor is warming up in the bullpen.
12. The praise band begins playing you off the stage.
11. The congregation is filling in the blanks of your outline before you get there.
10. You think the lyrics to a bluegrass song are really connecting with your audience.
9. When you pause for dramatic effect, several people giggle.
8. Your cell phone starts ringing, and you answer it.
7. The person signing for the deaf just pulled on mittens.
6. When the children are dismissed to junior church, most of their parents go, too.
5. Your sermon took shape over a glass of wine and volume three of Left Behind.
4. Your interpreter just rolled his eyes and put your last statement in quotation marks.
3. Desperate mothers are pinching their babies.
2. The ushers are handing out refunds.
1. You began your sermon with “Top 10 signs your sermon isn’t going well.”
Cute, Duke, Cute. Did #1 apply to your message last Sunday?
ReplyDeleteno, but it will next Sunday ;-)
ReplyDelete“Have you died before? Because that looks like a resurrection body to me..” whoah!!! hahaha
ReplyDelete