The Gospel Confronts Road Rage

I've enjoyed the material at the website called "Mount Jesus," featuring discussion on the Sermon on the Mount. But this one hit a personal nerve: Open Heart Surgery, with a spoon.

"A spiritual mentor once told me that a good way to gauge my comprehension and embrace of the Fathers agape love is by observing my thoughts and reactions when driving. He said: “do you want an indication as to whether or not you believe the father loves you? Observe your reaction to slow and incompetent drivers while rushing to get somewhere”. As I began thinking about this concept I quickly admitted my frustration with bad drivers and incompetent behavior. Honestly, the term frustration is a far cry from my real feelings; the truth is I absolutely hate incompetence, both in myself and in others. It makes me furious....

....Forgetfulness, non-efficient methods, irrational behaviors and bad directions drive me mad. It’s like my emotions become a pressure cooker building up, and although I often feel like placing my hands around the neck of countless numskulls who cross my path daily, I have mastered the craft of “Christian behavior modification”. Unfortunately I am usually oblivious to this deep-rooted hatred and when/if I do become aware of it I often succeed at convincing myself that my thoughts are justified. I mean really, is it my fault that I work with a bunch of lazy, good for nothing slackers who cant seem to accomplish the most trivial of tasks?

This type of thought pattern, which is pervasive throughout our society makes perfect sense according to rational logic, however is in direct opposition of the Gospel of Grace. Just as Christ called the Scribes and Pharisees hypocrites and whitewashed tombs, he says to me: façade, façade, façade. It’s all a masquerade, controlled by deep breaths, hypocritical prep-talks and pharisaical veneers. My disease-infected heart is filled with bitter rage and hidden by a thick layer of camouflage. The outside of my cup is clean but my inside is often more wretched than a mountain mans spittoon. Judgmental condemnation and curses fill my heart as I look upon failures, slackers and those who just can’t get it right.

Now comes the how and why questions. How can a person who claims to embrace a message of grace and peace, so powerful that it transformed a ruthless assassin into a faithful disciple who gave his life away, become filled with anger and hate? Why is it so easy for me to become pissed off because grandpa took a tad bit too much of his medicine before driving to the bingo lodge?"

Ouch! Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner.