The Cliff's Notes Bible

The "Cliff's notes" version of the entire Bible:

GENESIS

God: "All right, you two, don't do the one thing. Other than that, have fun."

Adam & Eve: "Okay."

Satan: "You ssssssshould do the thing."

Adam & Eve: "Okay."

God: "What happened!?"

Adam & Eve: "We did the thing."

God: "Guys..."

THE REST OF THE OLD TESTAMENT

God: "You are my people, and you should not do the things."

People: "We won't do the things."

God: "Good."

People: "We did the things."

God: "Guys..."

THE GOSPELS

Jesus: "I am the Son of God, and even though you have done the things, the Father and I still love you and want you to live. Don't do the things anymore."

Healed people:" Okay! Thank you!"

Other people: "We've never seen him do the things, but he probably does the things when no one is looking."

Jesus: "I have never done the things."

Other people: "We're going to put you on trial for doing the things."

Pilate: "Did you do the things?"

Jesus: No.

Pilate: "He didn't do the things."

Other people: "Kill him anyway."

Pilate: "Okay."

Jesus: "Guys..."

PAUL'S LETTERS PART I

People: "We did the things."

Paul: "Jesus still loves you, and because you love Him, you have to stop doing the things."

People: "Okay."

PAUL'S LETTERS PART II

People: "We did the things again."

Paul: "Guys..."

REVELATION

John: "When Jesus comes back, there will be no more people who do the things. In the meantime....STOP DOING THE THINGS!!!"

THE END