Stressed Out

Feeling stressed out? That's a rhetorical question: We all feel stressed now a days. Check out 4 Pieces of Advice for Stressed Out Christians by David Murray, author of Reset: Living a Grace-Paced Life in a Burnout Culture. (HT: Crossway)

1. Be Honest

Are you feeling stressed, anxious, burned out? Right now, the first thing you have to do is be honest about it—with yourself, first of all. Don’t deny it, don’t pretend it’s not there. Face up to it.

And then be honest with your wife, or a friend, or a pastor, and start sharing and seeking help.

2. Get Help

That’s the second step: get help. You can’t usually fix this on your own. You need outside help—maybe a doctor, or a friend, or a spouse to keep you accountable.

3. Be Holistic

The third thing is be holistic in your approach. Don’t just think, “Oh, I’ll just address the physical, or the spiritual, or the relational . . .” but address all of these areas. Look at all of these areas in terms of causes and cures.

Causes of burnout can be divided into two types: On the one side there is what I would call life situations, and on the other side, lifestyle.

Life situations are things we have very little choice or control over. These are events or situations that happen to us: you lose a loved one, you lose a job, you relocate, you have family conflict. There are things that happen that cause stress or anxiety that you really have no control over.

On the other hand, there is lifestyle. These are things we choose, things we have control over: how long we work, how hard we work, how many days we work. There’s also lifestyle in terms of financial level we live at, exercise, how we eat—all these things that we have control over and can make choices about but we’re making the wrong choices.

Often it’s not just one thing, but lots of things that come together, either life situation, or lifestyle, or sometimes both.

4. Have Hope

The fourth thing is have hope. Many have been there—I’ve been there, lots of men I’ve counseled have been there. If you use the God-ordained means that he has graciously provided, you’ll come out of it, so don’t give up.

Releasing Stress

From Ron Edmonston - A 4 Step, Simple Strategy to Have A Less Stressed-Filled Life. (Picture taken from original atricle)

Are you ever stressed?

Silly question, right?

We can never remove all the issues of our life that bring us stress. We have to somehow learn to navigate our lives through stress.

I have some easy suggestions. I have shared this strategy so many times. I hope you find it helpful.

Let me warn you, this isn’t some deep, researched system. These are simple. But, in my experience, they are powerful suggestions.

Here are 4 steps to a less stressed life:

Get a set of index cards. Write on each one what you are most concerned about in life right now. Only one concern per card, but use as many cards as necessary. Everything you’re concerned about — worried about if that’s your word — goes on a card. (You can grab a cup of coffee if you want — since that’s in the picture.)

There is something cleansing about writing out your concerns. It is a therapeutic exercise. (Insider information — you’ll find some of the things don’t merit a card once you have to write them.)

Place cards. After you’ve completed your cards, lay them face up on a table in front of you. This is a bare your soul moment. Now, share them with God. He knows them already — better than you — but do it anyway. It is freeing to give your recorded burdens to your Creator.

Pray. Pray something like this, “God, this is what I have before me which I can’t handle. I’m asking You as my Father, who loves me more than I can imagine, to give me direction, success, wisdom, patience and understanding in every area of my life. Lead me along the path you would have for me. I’m trusting completely in you. If this season is a success in my life it will depend on You. I love You Lord. In Jesus name, Amen”.

Do the best you know how to do. And, then leave the rest in God’s hands.

Please understand this is not a formula for success. I don’t believe those exist.

And, this isn’t simple. I used the word simple earlier, but that was just to keep you reading. There’s nothing simple about walking away from your right to control your outcome and leaving things in God’s hands. Even though we ultimately have very little control over the way things turn out in our life — we still naturally want to try. Worry often comes easier than faith.

Also, understand God is certainly not defined by our prayers. God will do what is best for us and His will — even when that disagrees with what we think we want.
This “system” is, however, Biblical — in my opinion. I based it on Hezekiah’s actions in response to receiving a letter that threatened his entire kingdom. (Talk about stress.) Read that story again in 2 Kings 19:14-19.

I have tried this numerous times and God always responds to my humble attempt to surrender my fears, stress, and concerns to Him.

Sometimes this response has relieved me of my stress. Most of the time, however, this process helps me refocus and feel a sense of calm among my circumstances knowing my God is ultimately in control.

Try this and see what happens.

No Sweat

Finding Jesus in Stress

A prayer for finding Jesus in times of stress, by Scotty Smith (based on 2 Cor. 4:7-10):

    Dear Lord Jesus, to compare my stressors with the apostle Paul’s would be like comparing my photography with Ansel Adams’s, my preaching with Charles Spurgeon’s, or my cobbler making with a 5 star French pastry chef’s. There is simply no comparison. When I consider everything he experienced as your servant, honestly, I have nothing to bemoan or groan about.

     Nonetheless, Paul’s honesty is a great gift to me this morning. His freedom to acknowledge both his anguish and his joy in the same paragraph, gives me tremendous encouragement and focus. Posing and pretending were crucified at Calvary. Despair and hopelessness were sabotaged by your resurrection.

     Jesus, help me to be far more preoccupied with the treasure within than with the pressures without. If your all-surpassing power will be shown most dramatically through my weaknesses, then I’ll boast in them. If your incomparable beauty will be most clearly revealed through my hardships, then I’ll stop my whining. If your redeeming purposes will be most fully realized through my brokenness, then I’ll humble myself and surrender.

     With my palms up, I offer you praise for the treasure of the gospel. The gospelwill win the day, my heart, the nations, and the cosmos. Though there are seasons when throwing in the towel, finding another story, or just flat running away are incredibly attractive, where else would I go but to you?

     Jesus, you alone give the words of life, sufficient grace, and the hope of glory. May your voice grow ten times louder than any other voice, clamoring for my attention. In the coming hours, days, and weeks, demonstrate the wonders of your love and the sovereignty of your rule. So very Amen I pray, with hungry expectancy, in your trustworthy name.

It;s Okay to Not Be Okay

To all my friends: I hereby give you permission to sometimes not be okay. I agree with Jared Wilson:

Sometimes it’s hard to express your feelings to the people around you. Not because you’re afraid of what they’ll say, but because our culture doesn’t seem to be very keen on being honest about their pains. The reality is that way too many people are putting on a facade of perfection in order to keep people from knowing how they are truly hurting. It’s as if everyone feels like showing pain is a sign of weakness. I’m here to tell you that it’s ok to not be ok sometimes. Remember, even Jesus himself wept.

1. It’s ok to cry. 

- There is nothing wrong with crying. Who ever said crying is for babies was a liar, and definitely not ever watched The Notebook. The reality is that even Jesus himself wept, and that crying can sometimes be the relief you need to move on and re-group.

2. It’s ok to get frustrated. - No one has the answers to everything, and even the smartest of people in the world find themselves frustrated sometimes. It’s ok to not know the answer, solution, or reason for things that have taken place. The light at the end of the tunnel is knowing that God has everything under control, even when we ourselves do not. Don’t let anyone tell you it’s wrong to get frustrated. Sometimes frustration is the breeding ground of change.

3. It’s ok to get stressed. 

- Let’s face it, stress is unavoidable. I’m not saying it’s going to consume your entire life, but stress is one of those things that all of us will eventually encounter in one way or another. When you come into areas of your life that are considered stressful, realize that it’s only going to last as long as you allow it to. Stress is unavoidable, but allowing it to control your life is not. It’s ok to be stressed sometimes, just don’t let stress become who you are.

4. It’s ok to not understand.

- Not everything is going to have an answer, but that’s where the beauty of faith comes in. There are circumstances and events in your life that you aren’t going to understand, but you have to realize that it’s ok to not know all the answers. There is humility in saying “I don’t know.” And frankly, sometimes admitting that you don’t know is the first step in finding peace and comfort in your situation. Don’t let anyone tell you that it’s wrong to admit you don’t understand.

It’s ok to not be ok.