Feeling Dead on the Inside

Ever have that dead on the inside feeling? Check out and consider When You Feel Dead On the Inside: 10 Questions Every Struggling Christian Should Answer by Jedediah Coppenger

It wasn’t the first time I’d heard it. In fact, it was something I’d been told quite a bit as a pastor. “I feel dead on the inside.” It’s voiced by new Christians and seasoned Christians alike. I’ve said it a surprising amount of times. You don’t see it coming typically. It seems to just happen. The energy-intellectual, emotional, spiritual, or physical-isn’t there like it used to be.

So what do you do when you feel dead on the inside? What do you say to your loved ones when they feel this way? I’ve found that people who reflect on the following 10 diagnostic questions find the life and energy they’ve been missing more quickly and deeply than those that don’t. The way you answer these questions will determine what steps you need to take next.

How Life-Giving Is Your Devotional Life? Every Christian goes through seasons where their devotional life is incredibly life-giving and seasons where it’s a bit dry. In a dry season, you open the Bible or start to pray, but nothing seems to happen. You don’t leave more encouraged and aware of God’s gracious purposes for you and presence with you today. You don’t walk away with a humble confidence as you face your problem filled day. Unfortunately, you feel just like you did before—weary. When a dry devotional life becomes the norm, burnout is typically not far ahead.

How Often Are You Asking God For Help? Every Christian knows that they should pray, but most don’t. As they find themselves feeling more and more discouraged, rarely do they ask God for help more and more. It’s weird that when many people feel their greatest need for help, when they feel their weakest, they don’t ask for help. Is any of this true of you? If you aren’t asking for help from God, then you’re not accessing all of the resources available to you. If you aren’t accessing the divine resources available to you, then you’re looking for divine help from people and places that aren’t able to provide it—including yourself. Be on the lookout for a lack of prayerfulness as you diagnose your struggle.

How Much “New” Are You Facing? It always takes more energy to start something new than it does to do what you’ve always done. It could be a new job, a new project, a new schedule, new city, new relationship, or anything else that takes you out of your comfort zone. Too much “new” at one time raises your chances for burnout.

Plan to Grow in 2017

If you don't plan to grow, you are planning to stay the same. Here are Five Ways You Can Grow Spiritually This Year by J. Lee Grady

The last words the apostle Peter wrote in the Bible are priceless. He said: "But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To Him be the glory, both now and forever. Amen" (2 Pet. 3:18). Peter's plea to the first disciples still screams out to us today: "Grow!"

Remember, a disciple who was up and down in his faith, wrote this exhortation. In his early years, Peter bravely confessed that Jesus was the messiah one minute and then denied Him the next. But in the end, this impetuous, fearful, insecure Peter became one of the strongest leaders of the early church.

That's because he grew in his faith.

The Greek word for "grow," "auxano," means "to increase, to become more fruitful or to become greater." This is God's will for every Christian. God does not want us to remain in the same condition year after year. He desires that we be changed from one stage of glory to the next until we are transformed into the image of Christ.

But how does that happen? How do we grow spiritually? Is there anything you can do to encourage that growth as you step into this new year? I believe you must do the following:

1. Rediscover the Bible. You need the Bible like you need food, but many Christians go for weeks or months without reading God's Word. No wonder their spiritual growth is stunted. You will never grow spiritually without soaking your mind in the inspired words of Scripture.

When Jesus told the devil, "Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God" (Matt. 4:4), He was quoting a verse from Deuteronomy that He had memorized. If Jesus found life in Scripture, so should you.

It's not complicated. Pick a book of the Bible and begin reading one or two chapters a day. Don't just casually read it on your phone. Invest in a study Bible and pour over the words carefully as you underline key phrases. And before you read, ask the Holy Spirit to illumine the verses you need to hear. He will speak to you.

2. Restart your prayer life. British preacher Charles Spurgeon told his congregation: "As well could you expect a plant to grow without air and water as to expect your heart to grow without prayer and faith." A Christian who does not pray is weak, immature and defeated. But when you venture into the realm of the impossible and start asking God to move supernaturally in your family, your personal challenges, your workplace, your church and your nation, you will soon see His miracles.

This year, I was inspired by the movie War Room to make an actual prayer closet in my house. I got an old chair and a bulletin board and created my own private spiritual retreat. As you begin 2017, do something radical to make prayer a lifestyle.

3. Reconnect with God's people. I often meet Christians who tell me they've given up on church. Usually it's because they were hurt at a previous church or got bored with the way things were done. But no matter how many legitimate reasons you have for boycotting church, the truth is that God calls us to find our place in His house. You will never grow if you disconnect yourself from His corporate dwelling place.

4. Resist your sinful habits. Like the children of Israel in the wilderness, some Christians wander around in circles their entire lives and never get anywhere. That's because they never break free from habit patterns that prevent them from growing. It's like taking the same class over and over and always failing.

Have you been stuck in a spiritual rut because of an addiction to pornography, an obsessive fear or an un-yielded attitude that ruins your relationships? It's time to break free. God has already promised "a way to escape" from any temptation that drags you down (see 1 Cor. 10:13). You will need to humble yourself and confess your sin to a mature believer, but after that, you can find deliverance from any stronghold of sin.

5. Recommit yourself to investing in others. Jesus told His disciples He wanted them to reproduce His life in other disciples. He said: "You did not chose Me, but I chose you, and appointed you, that you should go and bear fruit, and that your fruit should remain" (John 15:16a-b). That means we can't truly grow into mature disciples unless we lead others to Christ and help those younger believers mature.

Many Christians today are satisfied to take, take, take while they become spiritually obese. They receive but never give. They view church as a spiritual buffet line where they can gorge on messages from popular preachers and compare the personal benefits of their flavor-of-the-month teachings. But Christianity is not about bringing on spiritual truth for our own benefit. If your faith is focused on you, you will never grow.

In 2017, I challenge you to step out of your comfort zone and find your outlet. God has a place for you to serve. Make a quality decision that you are not going to just sit in a church chair and soak in one more sermon; no, it is time to act on what you have learned. Get up and share your faith. That is the secret of spiritual growth.

Myth of a Perfect Church

From Church in A Circle - the Myth of the Perfect Church:

Human beings are created with an inbuilt tendency towards idealism. Fairy tale stories and superhero movies reflect our need for happy endings and superhuman abilities. We grow up with romantic and unrealistic expectations of life, which are often dashed against the rocks of reality, leaving us hurt and disappointed.

You can see this idyllic imagination at work in our searches for a romantic partner. My youngest daughters (age 6 and 4) sometimes take turns being a bride and marrying each other, already living out the dream of “happily ever after”. They don’t yet know that every marriage involves two very different and flawed humans, who will have downs as well as ups, and who will never fully be able to meet each other’s needs and expectations.

When it comes to church, we have the same idealism, only even higher. After all, we have Scripture verses to back it up. We long to be part of an intimate community of people who love one another, accept us as we are and empower us to be all we can be.

Our idyllic notions often take a battering in institutional church, so we turn our hearts towards a romanticised notion of “organic church”. In our minds, this new-and-improved-model-of-church will meet all our needs and bring us towards “happy ever after”. In the real world, organic churches have their problems too – their power struggles, personality clashes and failure to meet people’s expectations.

Organic church life can be amazing. In fact, institutional church life can be equally amazing. However, just like a marriage, any of these relational settings needs to be approached with the right mindset and commitment to playing our part. There are certain characteristics which will create the transformational community we long for – honesty,authenticity, acceptance, kindness, patience, love. The problem is, these things come at a cost. They require effort and truckloads of maturity. They are not always easy and they don’t always feel good.

If you want to find some magical, picture-perfect church community, give up now. However, if you’re prepared to struggle with your own issues, put up with other people’s foibles, and commit for the long haul, you may just find glimpses of the joy and fellowship you crave. It won’t be an easy journey, but along the way you will change yourself and your church community, for good.

Covenant Friendship

From J. Lee Grady - 6 Qualities of A True Covenant Friend. May the Lord grant us more such relationships!

How many covenant friendships do you have? 

The Bible says Christians should experience deep connections with each other because we share the same indwelling Holy Spirit. In fact, the Greek word for fellowship, as used in Acts 2:42, is koinonia, which implies intimate communion and selfless sharing.

Yet as I travel and meet Christians all over the country, I find that the church today is actually a very lonely place. Many people have experienced a total relationship shutdown. Some have walked through painful church splits, others have been betrayed by friends they trusted, and still others have closed their hearts entirely to avoid being hurt. As a result, koinonia becomes a fancy theological word for something they will never experience.

It's as if we forgot how to have true friends. I've even met pastors who've told me they just can't risk building friendships. So they live in isolation. They bear their own burdens. They get no encouragement. Some end up in depression. Something is wrong with this picture!

Recently the Holy Spirit drew me to study the friendship that developed between David and Jonathan during David's early years. It is clear from the biblical record that God put Jonathan in David's life at a crucial time in his journey to the throne. And if it were not for Jonathan's covenant relationship with his friend, David would never have been able to overcome the obstacles he faced during the reign of King Saul.

The same is true for all of us. You will never achieve your maximum spiritual potential without the help of those key relationships God places around you. Yet in order to benefit from these friendships you must open your heart and take the risk of being a friend.

How can you move from being isolated to developing close friendships? Proverbs 18:24 says: "A man who has friends must himself be friendly" (NKJV). You can't wait for a friend to reach out to you. Take the first step and be willing to break the stalemate. British preacher Charles Spurgeon put it this way: "Any man can selfishly desire to have a Jonathan; but he is on the right track who desires to find out a David to whom he can be a Jonathan."

Here are six qualities I see in Jonathan that challenge me to be a better friend:

1. Jonathan nurtured a spiritual bond. After David killed Goliath and moved to Saul's palace, the Bible says "the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David" (1 Sam. 18:1). This is the work of the Holy Spirit. All Christians should experience a sense of family connection, but there are certain friends you will feel deeply connected to because God is putting you in each other's lives for a reason. Don't resist this process. Let God knit you to people.

2. Jonathan showed sacrificial love. Jonathan loved David so much that he risked his life to help him fulfill his mission. Jonathan even dodged Saul's spear in his effort to help his friend. He lived in the spirit of Jesus' words about friendship: "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends" (John 15:13). The world says we should only care about our own success. But the best way to become more like Jesus is to help someone else succeed!

The Secret to Creating Community

The biggest problem people have in searching for community is just that. You don't find community; you create it through love. Look how this transforms the way you enter a room full of strangers. Our instinctive thought is, "Who do I know? Who am I comfortable with?" There's nothing wrong with those questions, but the Jesus questions that create communities are, "Who can I love? Who is left out?"

Here are two different formulas for community formation:

1. Search for community where I am loved: become disappointed with community

2. Show hesed love: create community

--Paul Miller, A Loving Life: In a World of Broken Relationships (Crossway, 2014), 100; italics original

HT: Strawberry-Rhubarb Theology

The Requirements?

The Miracle Sitting Next to You

Is there a miracle sitting next to you in church today? From Marshal Segal at Desiring God:

God gave me you to be my miracle.

That’s the banner over our relationships in the church. God performs the miracle of our growth in godliness through people — Holy-Spirit-filled people in our lives and churches.

These are the people sitting next to you in corporate worship this morning. Maybe another morning with the same people at the same building on the same day of the week begins feeling ordinary or natural. But there’s power in that room. What happens when God’s word sounds, his Spirit falls, and our prayers rise shakes whatever hold sin continues to have in our lives.

More Like Jesus

You receive the word with these people. You sing with these people. You give and serve and plan with these people. And you are made holy with this people. We grow in our faith and devotion and purity and joy in the context of this specific community of believers.Russell Moore uncovers the corporate miracle of our sanctification in his chapter of the new book, Acting the Miracle. If we want to be more like Jesus, we can’t leave home without the church. It is God’s indispensible, irreplaceable means of making us holy. And our words play an especially important role in that process.

Miracles That Kill Sin

Moore speaks specifically to the miracles our words can be for one another. He writes, “The word of the church breaks the power of the deception of sin” (122). People all around you — people you love — are blind to their sin and therefore being consumed by it. They simply cannot see the futility and rebellion in which they are living.

And your words might make the miraculous difference. The timely application of Scripture, or rehearsal of the gospel, or warning of what’s to come, or gentle rebuke of sinful behavior, may save someone from eternal bondage, punishment, and death. By God’s grace and power, your words eternally save and sanctify — your words, the one resource we have that never runs dry.

Want Community?

"Two Of The Biggest Barriers To Community" - Pete Wilson

Radical Implications

"The gospel has radical social implications. It means I am a Christian before I am anyone or anything else.It means that all barriers that separate people in the world into warring factions come down in Christ."

         - Timothy Keller, Galatians For You, page 92

Dare to Be a Sinner

"In the presence of a psychiatrist I can only be a sick man; in the presence of a Christian brother I can dare to be a sinner."

      - Dietrich Bonhoeffer