The Process of Recovery

“For just as sin, addiction, and misery typically go together, so do confession, healing, and the long process of redemption. We need redemption not just from our sins and addictions but also from their miseries — particularly those miseries that occasion more sin and deeper addiction. As all recovering sinners know, this process of healing and liberation, this ‘conversion unto life,’ this set of lessons to teach us how to dance again will prove to be as cunning, baffling, powerful, and patient as addiction itself.”

— Cornelius Plantinga  Not the Way It's Supposed to Be
(Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans Publishing, 1995), 149.

Hat Tip: Of First Importance

The Painful Side of Hope...and Healing

On the subject of hope for those suffering from abuse, addiction and emotional pain, here's an excerpt from Redemption by Mike Wilkerson.

Which is more painful? To live without hope or to catch a glimpse of hope only to have it disappear? Often, this is our experience on the eve of redemption. Certainly, God is not a fickle redeemer. He is faithful. But if we expect redemption to be mainly about comfort, we may be disappointed when—at least for a season—it brings more pain.

Or you may have come to God with a life that was a mess with sin and were relieved to find that he accepts you in Christ, just as you are. But in time, you were confronted with the reality that some of those sins from your former life still had a powerful hold on you. Some new Christians at this point are so discouraged they question whether they were ever saved at all.

Or you may have found that after years of harboring the pain of abuse in secret, it’s time to talk about it. You may have to revisit some painful memories or confront someone who has harmed you. The battle to decide to speak out is pain unto itself, intensifying the pain of the original abuse. Maybe you’ve made your secrets known, and your confidants, rather than comforting and protecting you, have hurt you further by suggesting that you keep quiet or have even blamed you for stirring up trouble by digging up the past.

The Antidote to Alcohol and Drug Addiction

Interesting review at Christianity Today of a book by Kent Dunnington with the thesis that Christian worship offers the only adequate response to the seductions of drink and drug.

Addiction and Virtue: Beyond the Models of Disease and Choice
by Kent J. Dunnington
InterVarsity Press, September 2011

What to Say and Not to Say

Know a Victim of Sexual Assault? What to Say and Not to Say - exerpted from From Rid of My Disgrace by Justin and Lindsey Holcomb.

Don’t say:

• I know how you feel.
• I understand.
• You’re lucky that ___________.
• It’ll take some time, but you’ll get over it.
• Tell me more details about what happened.
• I can imagine how you feel.
• Don’t worry, it’s going to be all right.
• Try to be strong.
• Out of tragedies, good things happen.
• Time heals all wounds.
• It was God’s will.
• You need to forgive and move on.
• Calm down and try to relax.
• You should get on with your life.

Do Say:

• I believe you.
• Thank you for telling me.
• How can I help?
• I’m glad you’re talking with me.
• I’m glad you’re safe now.
• It wasn’t your fault.
• Your reaction is not an uncommon response.
• It’s understandable you feel that way.
• You’re not going crazy; these are normal reactions.
• Things may not ever be the same, but they can get better.
• It’s OK to cry.
• I can’t imagine how terrible your experience must have been.
• I’m sorry this happened to you.